It is somehow “risky” to wish that things always should be as you want them to be or as you think they should be.
Thinking this – inflexible – way provokes strong and recurrent feelings of frustration and depression, as strong and recurrent is your belief or conviction about it.
Feelings of frustration and depression – regardless of the external source that produces them – feed on your own internal irrational beliefs and expressions such as “how terrible life is; it should not be like that.”
Tolerance to frustration and resilience are psychological tools that favor thoughts, beliefs and attitudes that suggest you see and face the “same reality” with a different vision.
Tolerance to frustration and resilience help you to discern if a reality that is causing you discomfort or emotional suffering, is as terrible as you think and feel it is… or maybe you are exaggerating the situation a little bit.
These psychological tools are also useful to realize if what you do not like, is or is not in your hands to change. And to be aware that, if it is in your hands to change it, even the smallest effort you make, will help you to feel better; but if it is not in your hands, even the most heroic effort, will be completely useless.
If you think that there are many obstacles in your life, you are right. And when you discover that you also have many opportunities, you are right too. Overcoming obstacles and taking advantage of opportunities are two equally positive and challenging possibilities in your daily life.
by Antonio Alonzo Ruiz, clinical psychologist, UVHM.
Specialist in intervention and education for adults,
MATIA Gerontological Institute.
Antonio Alonzo Ruiz, is a 60-year-old Yucatecan graduated from the School of Philosophy and Theology at the San Ildefonso Archdiocesan Seminary in Yucatán. Clinical psychologist and psychotherapist from the Hispanic University of Mexico, specializing in cognitive impairment, psychostimulation and psychological intervention in older adults, by the MATIA Gerontology Institute of San Sebastian, Spain. He has 32 years of experience working directly with seniors and families.
Antonio Alonzo Ruiz, psicólogo clínico, UVHM.
Manejo de Emociones y Envejecimiento.
Facebook: Antonio Alonzo